Christmas!

It has been an interesting Christmas season. Everybody got their cookies, and said they liked them, which is good. The Christmas party at work was very boring, but the food was good. Some people said they didn't recognize me at first. Guess I clean up pretty good.

We decorated the house, which turned out nice. We got these ornaments from Scott's parents, and they are so cute! One is a for a motorcyclist, and one is for a knitter:

Sorry my picture sucks. One snowman says, "To knit or not to knit- Is this a trick question?" And the other says, "If I'm riding a motorcycle, I'm happy!" And there is a little charm hanging from one arm.

Last week was sort of quiet at work for a change. On Thursday, my coworker and I went to Target- she wanted to get a couple gifts for our bosses, and I was charged with getting a card for my laid off boss's boss. While there, she kept asking what I'd like for Christmas, and I kept telling her "Nothing!" Afterwards we popped into TJ Max where she continued her inquisition. Eventually I pointed at a box of chocolate-covered cranberries, and said "How about those?" She grudgingly purchased them (apparently it was too cheap...) and I assumed she'd wrap them up and give them to me the next day with others' gifts. Fast forward to Friday. She comes in that morning and hands me a small Victoria's Secret bag, with the candy poking out the top. I figured she just used whatever bags she had around, and pulled out the cranberries and thanked her. Later that afternoon, I looked in the bag and saw these:

My first thought was that she accidentally left them in the bag, so I looked around, noted that she and I were the only ones around, then pulled them out and give her an inquisitive look. She says, "Oh you didn't see them before?" (meaning when I pulled out the candy). The look on her face told me that the gift was, in fact, very intentional. "No... (surprised) Are they for me?" "Yeah! Do you like them? I couldn't find the matching bra..." "Um... yes, they're really cute! Thanks!" Omg. I should add that my coworker is from very rural Asia, and often has a different perspective on things like giving your coworker lacy underthings. So I smiled and told her how nice the undies were (they are cute). And now I have a funny story.

I spent the weekend knitting, and learned to make white bread (it's easy and tasty!). My hands and right arm/shoulder feel like they're going to fall off due to the knitting and kneading, but it was worth it. On Monday I roasted a whole chicken, and made soup from the bones on Tuesday. This is funny in that I seem to have lost all meat-related squeamishness- I was a vegetarian for about 8 or 9 months, and never did well with the reality of meat (the closer it looked to it's original source, the less I wanted to eat it). But now, apparently, I don't care. While rinsing the raw bird, I even saw little bits of what I assumed to be organs stuck to the inside and it didn't bother me at all. After straining the broth, I picked through the bones/meat/everything else and again, was not phased. Weird, but whatever... it's just meat.

This morning, Santa brought me this bad boy:

Ensuring that next week will be filled with copious amounts of bread, cookies, and meringue. I'd like to knit it a cover, but I don't want to hide it. Now I have visions (or perhaps delusions) of making a cover out of clear vinyl. Maybe somebody already makes one! I'm off to go look... Merry Christmas everyone!

Some Good News and Bad News

Wow, it's been a while since I've posted to this blog. A lot has happened since October! The Christmas cactus bloomed, although quite a while before Christmas:

It was really pretty and the flowers weren't anything like I expected. Unfortunately they have since all fallen off, but we'll look forward to seeing them next year.

We had a really great Thanksgiving this year. We stayed at home and relaxed with our traditional dinner (mostly from boxes and cans).

The good people at my local Giant were awesome. Usually they carry a frozen boneless turkey breast that is perfect for Scott and I. It even comes with a little packet of gravy starter! But they didn't have any the day before Thanksgiving, which really bummed me out as Scott won't eat meat if it's still on a bone. However, they did have turkey breasts on the bone, and the guy at the butcher counter was happy to de-bone it for me. And for the first time ever, we made gravy successfully. The whole weekend was full of win.

The four day weekend was desperately needed, as work has been insane. We've got more contracts open than ever before, and everyone wants their crap yesterday. I've been working late every night for the past few weeks (except the week of Thanksgiving, where there would be no overtime pay) and it is so tiring. Then to make things a little more stressful, my company laid off 6 people. For three of them (it seems) this wasn't as horrible as it seemed because they got very generous severence packages. Two others looked pissed and dissapointed and I didn't see the last guy. I feel really bad for those last three guys; their severance probably didn't rock to much. The two I knew hadn't been with the company for even a year, and weren't executives or anything. It's sad that this had to happen right before the holidays, but I also know the company didn't really have a choice.

This is the second time I've survived company layoffs, and I'm told I won't have to worry for quite some time as my department is doing pretty well and needs me. What does worry me is this: My division consisted of a VP, Director, 2 Managers, and 3 others including myself before the layoffs. Post-layoffs, the division is, well, gone. Now there is just my manager, my coworker and me. It's very surreal to go into work one day and the entire division (however small) is gone, and my department has gone from 4 to 3 people.

On the bright side, I get an office now. There will be three free, and I've got mine all picked out. Hopefully I can keep the scavengers away... My boss says he'll call IT next week to get my phone number switched over and computer set up. I hope it works out- right now I've got a table as a desk, a plastic beaker in which to keep my pens, and I put my purse on a box of Kimwipes. Having a desk with drawers would be nice. And it only took me 3 years of hard work to get one!

In other work news, I'm going to the company Christmas party for the first time ever. I had to buy a new outfit and shoes, which was annoying. But it's cute, and makes me look like a grown up. Plus it looks good with my glasses. I've been wearing my glasses for past couple weeks because I'm out of contacts and have been too busy to make it to the eye doctor. Now I'm thinking of wearing them exclusively because people treat me less like an idiot when I wear them.

Speaking of Christmas, I made cookies yesterday. We can't afford lots of gifts this year, so everyone is getting cookies. I did make one special cookie to be included in my brother (and sister)-in-law's tin:

Just ignore my husband's notation. And I'd like to take a moment to thank the inventor of parchment paper. I love it more than anything else.

Cookie making was really fun this year. Usually something goes horribly wrong, but this time I had Christmas music, a dusting of snow, and no disasters. Very nice.

That's it for now. I'll try not to go another 6 weeks without posting this time.

Pumpkins!

Scott and I went to the pumpkin farm last weekend, and it was full of autumny goodness. We saw lots of wee animals:

We got to take a hayride to the pumpkin patch, where we picked two out:

And we also saw a kid (maybe 10 years old?) who had seriously wicked dreads. Scott and I were both pretty jealous. And our desire for dreads has increased ten-fold. We just have to wait for our hair to grow out now... I don't know how long he intends on waiting, but since I don't dig the "Rasta Lisa Simpson" look, I want to wait until my hair is at least shoulder length. So maybe a year?

We plan on carving the pumpkins tomorrow, and I'm sure pictures will follow. Until then, here are our squinty-at-the-sun selves, enjoying the awesome fall weather:

My Favorite Goblin

My pug, Spencer, turned 7 today. He's small, so I think that's late-middle age for a dog. Little gray hairs are popping up with more frequency, but he doesn't seem to be slowing down much. I made a cake for his birthday:

Spencer really loves his weiner. Even though he's fixed, he gives himself the ol' rub and tug often and with great zeal. He has no shame.

Yes, my frosting letters are improving... thank you for noticing.

Back to little Spencer, he also received a new hippo (to replace the smelly old one) and a new collar. He's had the same collar for a few years now (we get him a new one about once a year) but they were out of them today, so now he has a snazzy green stripey collar. I think he likes it better.

In honor of his birthday, I give you a list of the weird things I call Spencer:

1. Stinkerbell

2. Stinkerella

3. Smelly Belly

4. Stinker

5. Little Man

6. Bunny

7. Little Bear

8. Bunny Bear

9. Knob Goblin

10. Tough guy

He really is a Goblin. In fact, Spencer is remarkably gross for such a little dog. He snores, farts, blows snot on you, has terrible breath, drools, snorts, and makes gross hacking noises every now and then. But he's our little stinky goblin, and we love him bunches. Happy birthday, little man.

And This Too

It says Lazy Cunt because I once again used Betty Crocker cake mix and frostings. I did, however, get some cheap tips so I could write better. Obviously, I still need some practice.

Today's Musings

My neighborhood is infested with Stink Bugs. They would be cute if they weren't so keen on getting in my house. But they only stink if you smoosh them, so we have to either suck 'em up with the vacuum or catch the little suckers and toss them out the door.

It occurred to me today that I am going to be 27 next year. For some reason this makes me feel old, and yes, I am aware that the idea of 27 being old would be laughed at heartily by many. Maybe I just didn't realize I was so close to 30. Maybe I'm also a little freaked at how quickly the past 5 years or so flew by.

The weather at this point of the year is absolutely perfect. Just a touch of warmth during the day, then nice and cool all night. I love needing a sweater at night. I love not wanting to run away from the sun. I love the crunchy leaves, the colors, smells, shorter days... and everything else about fall.

We received a flier today warning us to vote against legalizing slots in Maryland. I used to live less than a mile from the Grand Victoria Casino in Elgin, IL, and I think these people are way off. They say, specifically, that slots in Maryland will bring: crime, bankruptcies, debt, traffic congestion, addiction, business closings, greed, and divorce. Crime I can see, they have a legitimate point there. Elgin had a handful of colorful homeless residents, and a slightly higher crime rate than the surrounding area. But it wasn't freakin' Cabrini Green or anything. Traffic congestion I don't see- at least not any more than adding a new Walmart would bring. Business closings I don't believe either. True, some of the people who normally spend money elsewhere will lose it at the casino. But what about all the other people that normally wouldn't come here, but come for the gambling then happen to spend money elsewhere? And 5 of those 8 (bankruptcies, debt, addiction, greed and divorce) really aren't my problem. I mean greed? Really? I'm supposed to care now that my neighbor is greedy? Give me a break. It really sticks in my craw when laws move from protecting us from each other to protecting us from ourselves. It's a waste of time and energy. Self-destructive people will always find a way to ruin their own lives. Not legalizing slots isn't going to stop them.

While the riverboat was a full casino (not just slots, as this amendment proposes), it is not "grand" as the name suggests. It's just a dirty little suburban casino, but it provided jobs and revenue to the city. Elgin had awesome holiday displays and fireworks shows, an annual rib-fest, a massive police force, a local orchestra, social services galore, and free parking. FREE PARKING! Scott and I have always said that if we move back to IL, we'll go back to Elgin. I really believe that the riverboat plays an integral role in making the City of Elgin great.

Normally, I don't vote on stuff like this because I really don't care. But now I'll be voting for spite, because the back of this flier contains what I'd call easily misconstrued facts. Here's the entire bullet point, quoted exactly:

"The industry's own numbers show that one to two percent of gamblers will have addiction problem. One in five will attempt suicide."

Now, what I believe they meant was one in five gamblers with an addiction problem will attempt suicide. But we are lead to believe is that one in five gamblers will attempt suicide. That's just rude. So now I'm making a mental note to vote YES on Question #2!

Overtime has been kicking my ass this week, and will continue to do so possibly forever. You see, another department wanted to borrow me for a while, and my boss said, "Oh no- she's much to busy!" Then came to me and said, "We need you to put in some overtime everyday so we can prove you're too busy to help them." Uh, yeah. Granted, I had offered to put in overtime if needed (I need extra $$ for painting, etc.), but I didn't think it would be everyday. Or for reasons like spite.

I've discovered that I have a possibly horrible perception of sugary toppings... several weeks ago I noticed a half-eaten container of Cool Whip was about to go bad. We didn't have anything to put it on, and I didn't want to throw it out, but it seemed wrong to eat it straight out of the tub. My solution? Put rainbow sprinkles on it. Cool Whip, while traditionally considered a "topping," ceases to be a topping by putting another topping on it. Now it is a tasty snack. Later I applied this same rationale to some leftover frosting: eating frosting straight out of the container is wrong, but add some rainbow sprinkles and Voila! Tasty snack. Today I took it one step further. We didn't have any leftover toppings, so I melted down a square of semi-sweet baker's chocolate and put rainbow sprinkles on that. Delicious.

Our elderly Greek neighbors have been yelling at each other all day again. Part of me is annoyed, and part of me really wants to learn Greek so I can figure out what they're saying. It could be really good ("Stop fucking my sister!"), but it could also be not fun at all ("This is the wrong kind of Metamucil!"). It's really a gamble as to whether it's worth learning another language. Maybe I'll just find a book on how to swear in Greek and start from there. After all, if they're not yelling obscenities at each other, how good can it be?

Speaking of obscenities, I've been experimenting with baking:

Yes, my cake says "Eat a dick." I started out slow, with Betty Crocker cake mix and frosting. I did make the light blue frosting by myself though. And I had to pipe it on with a plastic baggie, so give me a break on the lettering. It's a two layer cake, and it came out pretty well. And yes, there are rainbow sprinkles on it. Next time, I will actually make the cake from scratch (but still with pre-made frosting). And perhaps I will invest in one of those, um, frosting-piper thingies. You know, with the different tips?

The weather finally cooled down. I'm actually a little cold today, and last night I had to turn the heat on in the car- now that's exciting. Suddenly I'm very excited about knitting, and Halloween (which I'm taking off this year, just for funsies), and Thanksgiving... I love Thanksgiving more than life itself. Gasp! I just realized that September is nearly over. I have to go knit something.